Witching hour or as we call it in our house, “Unhappy Hour,” is that time when parental exhaustion meets baby’s desire to list all of the wrongs of the universe at the loudest possible volume. Baby standard time dictates when this will occur.
With my oldest, her wind up began around 4:30 p.m. so that by the time my spouse returned from work, I was in desperate need of a hand off and hot shower. With my middle guy, 6:00 p.m. marked the beginning of unhappy hour, meaning bedtime for the oldest was often a juggling act of bouncing an unhappy baby and corralling a overtired toddler. Whether it occurs at 4 or 8 p.m., this tricky hour (or three) requires a basket of tricks and Nested Mama’s got a basket ready for you. In this three part series, I’ll share with you my favorite resources, tips, and sanity promoting approaches to surviving unhappy hour. Part I: 7 Tips & Tricks to Survive the Witching Hour
Got any witching hour tips? Share them in the comments below. Looking for postpartum support? Learn more about Nested Mama Prenatal & Postpartum Support. When discussing the launch of my prenatal and postpartum doula support business with a dear friend, she mentioned how hard it is to ask for and accept help, even when you’ve just given birth.
She recalled how she didn’t even make use of all the postpartum visits that came with the birth doula package she purchased, because asking for and accepting help is that challenging for her. This, in turn, made me recall how this same friend had offered to bring me a meal after the birth of my youngest. And, then I remembered how I evaded and dismissed her generous offer - an offer I should have accepted with thankful enthusiasm. Why is it so hard to ask for help or to accept it when it is offered? Why couldn’t I simply say, yes, I’d love a meal next week and thank my friend? It is not that I was feeling like I had everything managed. On the contrary, I had three kids age four and under and no family in a four-hour radius. My spouse returned to work a week after Baby #3’s birth, leaving me at home all day with my three littles and a pelvic floor that needed several weeks of rest. On top of that, we’d moved into a new neighborhood in a new town just a few weeks earlier. I didn’t even know my next-door neighbor. The support my dear friend offered was exactly what I needed. Why do we, as mothers, feel like we have to go it alone when that is the opposite of what we need? Part of our national myth is the idea of rugged individualism. The self-made (wo)man whose ability to handle it all is a defining characteristic. Wow, that sounds terrible even as I type it. Let’s make a vow, shall we? Let us ask for the help we need. Let us accept it when it is offered. Because we need it, and we are worth it. And, we don’t have to go it alone. Before the birth of my first child, I thought I read ALL the books. In hindsight, I did read an impressive stack of material. But, most of it focused on pregnancy and childbirth and not the blurry, hazy, beauty of the early postpartum days. I’m sure I at least whizzed by some statements about biologically normal newborn sleep, but in no way did those statements prepare me for the reality of nighttime parenting in the weeks and months that followed baby’s birth. While sniffing that wonderful scent of newborn baby and gazing in rapt attention at my child’s adorable features, I also found myself - like most new mothers - completely and utterly exhausted.
I’m not here to share with you a magical recipe that allows you to bypass normal newborn behavior. Nope - newborns need us, day and night, and that’s okay. Instead, I’ve got five tips - some you can even do before baby is born - to give yourself a soft, fluffy cushion of support, and yes, get more sleep in the newborn days. Here are five things that you can do to improve your quality of sleep with a newborn baby -
Want to get more Nested Mama tips and tricks for postpartum life? Connect with Nested Mama. Looking for a holistic, evidence-based approach to family sleep? Nested Mama offers Infant Sleep Education workshops and consultations. Find out more here. |
AuthorJohanna received a Ph.D. in English in 2014. Now a postpartum doula and educator of childbirth, breastfeeding, and infant sleep, she blogs about pregnancy, birth, postpartum, and parenting. Archives
February 2021
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