 Struggling with little one's sleep? Schedule your free chat to learn about Nested Mama's holistic approach to family sleep. Let's face it - there are no shortage of "miracle" items targeting you, the sleepless parent, with the promise of more sleep for you and your little ones. As ironic as it may sound coming from someone whose business centers on supporting families as they deal with the tricky stages and transitions of infant and toddler sleep, I am always VERY leery of anything that suggests it can help little ones sleep longer. Why is that? Well, any quick look into the scientific literature on infant sleep tells us that waking at night in search of parental reassurance - whether for food or a snuggle - is normal. That said, as I often share with clients, just knowing it is normal doesn't automatically make it easy to navigate on your own. Enter the lovey - a strategy parents often turn to as they seek to make transitions from one means of nighttime soothing to another. Sometimes, presenting a child with a lovey results in interest that grows to attachment and the child finds comfort with the lovey. Sometimes, you give your kid a lovey and they decide that some other household object - a dump truck, a scrap of fabric, or something else - fits the role of beloved comfort object much better. While we cannot always predict what object our little ones will deem "perfect" and worthy of lovey status, we can be thoughtful and intentional in the objects we offer and facilitate their introduction with care. I found myself pondering this as we considered Christmas gifts for our then 3 month old. As baby #4, our littlest has no shortage of hand-me-down blankets and plushies and other typical lovey choices. At this young age, I was looking for a lovey that could be used primarily as a source of comfort while in the car seat. I wanted something soft, sweet, and washable.
***Please note both of these photos were of fully supervised sleep surrounded by attentive caregivers.*** So why Lulla? At this age, my primary objective was to get a sense of familiarity with an object that could offer comfort while we traveled in the car. Not only is Lulla cute and cuddly, the doll also offers a soothing pairing of heartbeat and breathing sounds. Designed to help NICU babies who are separated from caregivers yet need the soothing sense of presence, Lulla offers an approximation (note, not replacement for) the reassurance of a caregiver's heart and breathing. Because spit up and, well, life require all things be washable, I love how easily the outer stuffier portion removes for cleaning. No stress there! If I'm honest, I find a lot of the musical variety lovies more grating than soothing, so the simple white noise offered by Lulla is a welcome alternative. We know that adding anything to baby's sleep surface is not recommend, and Lulla acknowledges this, providing means to attach to the outside of a crib and thus still provide white noise during sleep. For us, Lulla became a tool to make car travel easier on everyone. And, when little one is ready grab a lovey and snuggle it to bed, he'll have a friend he's known a long time in Lulla! ***Nested Mama is a participant in the GoAffPro Affiliate Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to the partner site*** What does this mean? When you purchase a Lulla Doll through a link on this blog, I earn a small commission. These small commissions are so helpful in keeping the Nested Mama blog up and running, and I only become an affiliate of products and services I feel strongly about and utilize with my own family. Struggling with little one's sleep? Schedule your free chat to learn about Nested Mama's holistic approach to family sleep.
 Schedule your free chat to learn how Nested Mama's private childbirth classes can prepare you for the journey ahead!Pregnancy can be such a busy time - appointments with your provider, researching baby gear, baby showers, planning your leave from work, finding a daycare provider, reading ALL the pregnancy books, turning your house into a home for baby, and so on. The thought of adding one. more. thing. can be overwhelming - I know I've been there. There are also financial concerns to balance - anticipating the bill from the hospital, making adjustments for maternity or paternity leave, buying ALL the baby things, and so on. Given the time and financial pressures of this moment, perhaps it seems like investing in childbirth education - especially outside the hospital classes - is something that can't quite fit. I hear you. I do. But, birth matters. Not just birth in general, but YOUR birth matters. You matter. We often emphasize the importance of a healthy baby, but I maintain there is room for valuing a healthy and happy birthing parent in that equation, too. As a childbirth educator who offers classes outside the hospital environment, I can share with you all the options and choices - the full birth buffet - rather than a menu limited by policy or staff preference. As a childbirth educator who is also a doula, I believe in the importance of nonjudgmental support, and I carry this with me into the space and community of my classroom. There is room for your hopes and your fears in my classroom as well as your birth choices, whatever those may be. Childbirth education shouldn't just tell you about birth, it should prepare you with a confident knowledge of labor and birth. It should support you as you craft a full toolbox particular to your desires to meet birth's challenging moments. And, it should inspire you with a fire to advocate for what is right for you. And, birth is just the beginning. As a breastfeeding educator and sleep educator, I offer a series of classes to prepare you for life after baby and strengthen your partnership ahead of time to meet the ebb and flow of life with your new little one. If you're feeling ready to invest in your birth with more classes, I give you a big high five. Come check out the full range of classes offered by Nested Mama, including group classes, webinars, and private classes to meet your busy schedule needs.  In the absence of a "village" to nurture us postpartum, it can be hard to know where and when to reach out for support. Our culture maintains a myth wherein the birthing parent can do it all. In reality, the days, weeks, and months after baby's arrival are a time when a go-it-alone approach can lead to isolation and exhaustion. At least, it did for me. Hiring a postpartum doula is one way families can say "yes" to more support and invest in a service that can bring ease into that first year after baby. But, depending on your lifestyle or little one's age, traditional postpartum doula services that focus on in-home day and overnight support may not be the right fit. Maybe your support network is great with laundry and meal prep, but you need more nonjudgmental, compassionate conversation to uplift you as you navigate a tricky stage postpartum. Perhaps you've got your household running smoothly but the thought of having a link to evidence-based resources and a sounding board for your transition into parenthood would offer you a sense of ease. Or, maybe the idea of a doula in your home doesn't sound like the right match, but a combo of emotional and informational support offered online fits perfectly with your preferences. If any of the above sounds like you, Online Postpartum Doula services may be the support you always felt you needed but didn't know you could ask for. Now, you can.  So what is Online Postpartum Doula Support?
Nested Mama combines weekly video chats and unlimited emails to provide you heart-centered support when and where you are in life with baby. Video Chat
Nested Mama is all about your parenting journey and how you build confidence and joy along the way. Online doula support is a flexible way to make that happen when and where you need it. Want to learn more? Schedule a free 15-min discovery call and see if Nested Mama is the right fit for what you need.  Birth is intimate. Birth is powerful. Birth is beautiful. Are you looking for a birth photographer to document this life-changing experience for you? I'm thrilled share with you the fabulous birth photographers who serve Iowa City and Cedar Rapids. Read on to learn what makes each of these photographers so talented and unique, and take a look at some of their AMAZING birth photos!   New Creation Photography What Laura says about birth photography, Birth can be exhilarating AND exhausting! After photographing nearly 90 births, I've learned to expect the unexpected. It's part of what makes birth photography so exciting! The moments that I have had the opportunity to capture for clients - dad supporting mom through labor, baby taking her first breath, and those teeny tiny wrinkly fingers and toes - are sometimes indescribable, and I'm so honored to be able to provide families with beautiful photographs of their birth story to help them remember the details forever. I am Iowa's most experienced birth photographer and know well the commitment and dedication it requires to be on-call and get to a birth at 2 a.m. when necessary. This is what I do. Years of professional photography experience help ensure that the emotion and events of your baby's birth will be captured perfectly and authentically in breathtaking photos of your big day.  Katie Rivera Photography What Katie says about birth photography, Birth. It is one of life's most incredible experiences. There's something about the anticipation, the hopefulness, the tears, the laughter, the joy that make the breath of new life so indescribably beautiful. At Katie Rivera Photography it is my absolute joy to capture these moments and freeze them forever through the art of birth photography. All births come with a uniqueness and a story that has never before been told. Birth photography allows clients and their families to forever recall their unique story; the way moms hands gripped the bed during labor, the room quiet as it witnessed just how strong and beautiful the female body was created to be, baby's first look at the outside world. Details too unique and precious not to be told through the powerful images of birth photography. After taking part in thousands of births as a former labor and delivery nurse, the miracle of birth never fades. This is why at Katie Rivera Photography I have become so passionate about capturing births! Ina May Gaskin once said, "Whenever and however you intend to give birth, your experience will impact your emotions, your mind, your body and your spirit for the rest of your life." Get those emotions in a photograph. I promise you wont regret it!
Stacey Schmitt Birth Services & Photography What Stacey says about birth photography, As a birth doula, it was easy for me to implement birth photography for my families. I am able to capture moments they want to remember and piece together a timeline of a beautiful day. When the birthing mom is in her birth zone taking on the waves of labor, the support in a firm hand grasp from her partner, to revealing the big introduction of holding baby for the first time; it is your story of transformation to motherhood. Birth photography can be something you display for all to see or keep the story personal; either way the day your baby is born is unforgettable, why not capture those images you can flip through and remember those feelings and emotions of adding a new little to your family.  Little Love Photography What Emily says about birth photography, Being invited into a delivery room is the the most humbling experience of my job. Birth is such an emotional and personal time that I am honored when I am chosen to capture that memory for someone. I get to go to work and capture a brand new dad seeing his baby for the first time. I document the look on mom's face when she hears her baby cry for the first time and again when she has this perfect little person placed on her chest. There are a million firsts in birth photography. The first time mom runs her fingers through a fresh head of hair, counting fingers and toes, checking out every single roll, deciding whose nose/eyes/ ears this baby has, foot prints, first diapers, and first baths. There are so many memories that no one wants to forget BUT labor is long. Labor is exhausting. No matter how much we want to remember every single moment of that entire day, some things can be forgotten. And that is why I am there. I want to be the fly on the wall that can flood your memory with every heart tugging moment that happens that day. I have a truly amazing job that gives me the opportunity to meet amazing families. I love what I do.  Rebekah Stewart Photography What Rebekah says about birth photography, I love birth photography because no birth is ever the same. Each of my clients comes to me with different experiences and expectations, and each pregnancy and delivery is different, as well. Whether it's a scheduled c-section or a 3 AM homebirth, birth is never boring! My approach during births is documentary or "fly on the wall" - for the most part, I'll only speak when spoken to. My goal is for my birth clients to totally forget that I'm there! Labor and delivery is such an intense time - having a birth photographer ensures all partners are able to be fully present without worrying about missing anything.  Sandi Spurrell Photography What Sandi says about birth photography, Priceless is the first word that comes to mind when I think about birth photography. The day you welcome your precious bundle of joy will go by in a blink of an eye! Your baby will have many firsts on this day. The first breath, the first look, the first touch, the first kiss, the first tear, the first pout and many more firsts! Your baby will be cleaned up, weighed, measured, looked over, foot print taken, dressed and then the nurses will put a little hat on his/her cute little head. Having a professional birth photographer there will give you one less thing you will need to worry about on this very important day. The moms that I have photographed for have told me they were so glad they had their births photographed and they look back at the photos often. PRICELESS!   Haley Lent Photography What Haley says about birth photography, I love birth photography and I think it’s really important. It is so easy to sort of “forget” all of the little moments that happen during labor and delivery because you’re just so focused. Even in the first days after my deliveries, the details of my labor and delivery experiences started to fade. After several years, things tend to just become a blur. I believe that looking through your birth images really brings you back to those things that have faded over time. You also get a totally different perspective of everything, which is a lot of fun. I feel so blessed that my clients let me into such a huge and personal event in their lives, I’ve even held a leg on a couple of occasions while shooting (which is SO cool). I have never had a client regret having me there to photograph their birth, and they are always just blown away when they see their final images. Births never get old or less exciting and are definitely my favorite thing to shoot. 
 As a mother of three, I can remember how the births of my babies are now a completely overwhelming blur of emotions. Having a birth story told through images captures each moment, gentle touches, first looks, and the intense emotion of welcoming your baby into the world. After photographing over 30 births, I am continuously amazed at how similar and different each birth experience is. Our bodies are amazing and powerful, and I feel incredibly honored each time I am able to witness the first breaths of a sweet babe. I take the approach of being a fly on the wall, quietly snapping away the moments that are meant to be treasured, and later can be used to provide my clients with a full gallery showcasing the story. Since I don't put a cap on the number of images I provide, each gallery is truly a collection of stills that helps to bring those blurry memories into focus. Looking for more support as you transition into parenthood? Nested Mama offers doula services, childbirth and breastfeeding education, and infant sleep consultations. For more connections to our local community, follow Nested Mama on Facebook and Instagram.
Some days of mothering are beautiful. Some days are beautifully intense. Some are beautifully intense and also exhausting and hard. I remember being in my second pregnancy and so tired. Just so tired. And, despite my overwhelming desire to sleep and rest, my wonderful toddler continued to move into new, exciting, and challenging stages. These stages required lots of physical play, vigilance over choking hazards, and growing pains for me as I learned how to parent her in year two. A few weeks ago, I found myself scrolling through the posts of one of my favorite online parenting support forums. A mom* posted about the challenges of being in the third trimester of a pregnancy and parenting a toddler. She asked if anyone could share some suggestions for how to handle a toddler who was struggling with change and transition. Thinking primarily of helpful parenting tips, I shared a favorite parenting resource I turn to when a phase of kiddo development sends me scurrying for new tools. I also mentioned my go-to recipe of empathy, verbalizing my kids feelings, and repeating over and over, “My child is having a hard time, not giving me a hard time.” But, a few days later while out on a run, I couldn’t stop thinking about this mom and my response to her post. To be fair, the original post had asked for parenting tips, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that I’d neglected something important in my reply. In my rush to offer helpful advice, I forget to say something even more vital - that finding yourself at the end of a pregnancy and facing toddler parenting is hard. So hard. And, it is okay, human, normal, and healthy that this would be a challenging time. As my feet found their rhythm on the pavement, my mind continued to swirl around the words I wished I said. These words would offer not a list of how-tos, but acknowledgment, validation, and support. Amazingly, the next time I found myself scrolling through the forum, this lovely mom had responded to my comment. She thanked me for my suggestions, but also expressed the same fear that lurks - sometimes fuzzily, sometimes sharply - in the back of my mind - the fear that I am failing my child. With that opening, I found the space to say the words that had played on a loop in my head for all those miles. Words that, better than any article or parenting tip, speak to the reality of that moment when heart and hands are full and body and spirit are tired. Gathering my courage, I wrote: “I was thinking about you on my run this morning. And, if I may be so bold, I wanted to share this with you. I know it is hard - this beautifully intense season of being at the end of a pregnancy, on the precipice of a huge family change, and parenting a toddler. Honestly, my end of pregnancy/early postpartum days with my toddlers were some of my big parenting challenges. But, I also know that one day, maybe in a month or a year, you'll look back on this time in a quiet moment and see it all with such clarity. You will feel both wonder at and utter conviction in your strength as a mother and your love for your children. You are not letting him down. Even when the individual moments seem oh so messy, know that you are enough.”  I realized, as I posted this response, that I was speaking as much to her as myself. Each season has its own intensity, its own challenge. But, if I’m honest, the biggest challenges come not from my children, but from me. How do I grow and change alongside my children? How do I parent them in a season that requires I constantly fill their cups when I find mine is almost always drained to the last drop?
For in responding to this lovely mom late in pregnancy and on the verge of transitioning into life as a mom of two, my own struggles surfaced. I was reminded of how I wept as though my heart was breaking about my fears of having enough love for two children before my labor finally started with my second child. I was reminded about how the times that seem most challenging with my children almost always coincide with my own big feelings rising up and fears speaking loudly in my mind. I was reminded, too, about the driving conviction behind my leap into work as a prenatal and postpartum doula. In these moments of transition, we need support. We need to know we aren’t alone. And, we need to know that we can do it, no matter how hard or overwhelming or frustrating it seems in the moment. If you find yourself in one of these beautifully intense seasons of mothering, dear reader, know that the moments may seem messy, but one day you will step back and see it clearly, outlined by your strength and love. *All details in this blog are shared with the permission of the mom who posted the original comment that is its inspiration. I am grateful for her willingness to let me share these thoughts and also the way in which our conversation deepened my own understanding. Looking for more support? Learn more about Nested Mama Prenatal & Postpartum Doula Support. Connect with Nested Mama on Facebook.  Wondering what you can do to ease your fur baby’s transition from only child to happy sibling status when you bring baby home? To answer this question and more, I’m thrilled to share an interview with Rebecca from Pals for Paws Petsitting. As a pet care professional, Rebecca shares important strategies for integrating your beloved animals and your new bundle of joy. And as a mom, she shares her personal postpartum experience and how life after baby doesn’t always look the way one expects. Before we get to questions about pets and babies, I'd love to know how you and your husband Aaron began Pals for Paws. What drew you to starting this business? We both loved animals, of course. Aaron grew up with a house full of dogs and cats - due to family allergies, I did not. Still, I had dreams of being a veterinarian, and worked for a vet in high school (where I promptly learned I did not want to be a vet anymore!). In college I worked for an animal shelter and pet supply store. Aaron's aunt had friends who needed pet care and suggested us, we went to meet with the lady, and she asked how much we charged. Charged?! I thought, amazed that someone would pay us to hang out with her animals. We took care of her animals, then she referred another friend, and another. I was in school for graphic design so I built us a website, and we started getting strangers for clients. It was very exciting and surprisingly busy. When we completed school, we both got full-time jobs and had to start turning down our clients. Aaron was unhappy in his job. We felt a little bad turning down the work we loved (the animals) in favor of the work he was struggling to enjoy, so we took a leap and he quit his job and started waiting tables so we could focus on the business. It grew and grew. Eventually, he was able to stop waiting tables and I was able to quit my full-time job, then quit my freelance work. It took about 7 years to go from our first clients to sustaining income for two people, and from there we added employees. We are almost 12 years in and employ five people. That's an amazing story, Rebecca. In those 12 years, I'm sure you've seen many clients bring home new babies. Can you share with us any tips for how to get ready to integrate a new baby and pets? Specifically, are there things families can do prenatally to make for an easier transition? Oh yes - many clients! I very much suggest taking your dog to training prior to the baby arriving. If you have never done training before, and especially if you regard your dog's "bad" behaviors as sweet quirks, this is the time to address them, NOT after. If the dog barks a lot, or jumps, it's time to start working on those issues. Training will also give you a better general sense of how to communicate with your dog and tools to use once the baby arrives. Even if you have a very well-behaved dog, I suggest refreshing them on commands like "Stay," "Off," and "Place." These are commands that you will be using! With a new baby, you will need space, and having a "Place" command teaches your dog that they have "their" space and they need to go to it. "Off" or "Leave it" is useful for dogs who are excessively interested in the baby's toys or, later, snacks. And "Stay" is something you'll use often for when visitors arrive. You will not be able to teach your baby to "Stay," but you can teach your dog, and that will make life easier. In terms of making the transition easier on the dog, in the months leading up to the baby's arrival, think about an area that can be the dog's space so they have a safe place to go to where the baby is not allowed. Let them become comfortable in this space prior to the baby coming so it doesn't feel like a time out or punishment space. If there are any areas that will be off limits for them when baby comes, start blocking those areas ahead of time. Also, think about how their routine might change and make those changes in advance so they become accustomed to fewer walks, walks at different times, shorter walks, going potty in the yard, and tapering down one-on-one time. While it's tempting to go all out giving them as much love as possible since it's about to change, that will be all the more abrupt of a change when the baby arrives. You don't want the dog to associate their decline in quality of life with the arrival of the baby. Plus, many pet parents feel guilty about "not having time for the dog" after the baby arrives. Getting yourself used to the new normal in advance of the rush of hormones (because let's face it, you're going to feel guilty about literally everything) may ease those feelings because it's not an abrupt change for you either! Finally, get the baby equipment out so they are familiar with it. Strollers and car seats can be a bit scary, especially if you have a skittish dog! If you are installing a gate in your vehicle, do that when you put the car seat in. Trust me when I say that it is much, much easier to address and prepare for these things during pregnancy than during postpartum! I love the idea of slowly easing into the changes ahead a time - makes so much sense to make these changes when you have the time and energy before baby arrives. If we follow this plan before baby, what would suggest we do after baby arrives to make a more positive transition? The traditional wisdom is to bring home a blanket or piece of clothing with the baby's scent from the hospital for your dog to get used to before bringing baby home from the hospital. When you actually come home, the baby should come in last - your pup is going to be so excited to see you after you've been away for a few days. He or she will most likely not be taking care to be gentle with the unexpected additional tiny human being in tow. When the baby is introduced, you can do it on whatever timeline feels comfortable to you, given your dog's behavior. The AKC suggests letting the dog get used to the baby's smell and sounds for a few days prior to letting the dog approach the baby. That being said, I'm not sure I know anyone who actually was able to do that! Regardless of how long you wait, you'll want a separate person holding the dog on a leash and paying close attention to their behavior. The dog will pick up on your nerves, so try to stay calm and positive. Whoever is holding the leash can also have treats if your dog handles itself well with treats - my dogs tend to get overly excited so I would not introduce that stimulus for my crew! Speak in your normal, happy voice and allow the dog to sniff the baby's feet from a distance. Things to watch for in terms of nervousness in a dog would be licking of lips or a tense stance. Praise your dog for gentle behavior then redirect to a sit or lay-down and give the dog some good pets and love. In my experience it really is common to see dogs immediately fall into a protective, gentle role around babies, BUT you don't want to just bank on that. Even if you have the friendliest dog, you still need to be proactive and careful when they're together. The dog should associate positive feelings with being around the baby, so having a partner (or even friends or visitors) love on the doggie in the same room as the baby will help make those associations. I do want to point out that if you haven't done preparations during pregnancy to get your dog used to the new routines, things might be difficult for a while. My best advice for that is to stick it out. Don't make decisions on rehoming your pet during the fourth trimester, because let me tell you, even with the best intentions, pets can make that period really difficult. In addition to your professional experience, you also have personal experience bringing a baby into a home with pets. Was there anything that surprised you about your postpartum experience with your pets? Being a pet care professional, I definitely went into it with a bit of the idea that I knew a lot about dog behavior and had a great handle on everything. I had my baby at home, and one of my dogs was in the room (the other went to a boarder because he's a bit on the wild side). My girl met my daughter within minutes of birth and it was very sweet and beautiful. On my daughter's first day on Earth, we all five sat in the nursery together: my, my husband, my daughter, and my two dogs. So idyllic.  Annie, our big white gentle giant, meeting Adeline as we follow none of the proper protocol. Photo Credit: Riley Curry I was surprised, then, that it didn't take long for me to not want them around me. At all. I adore my dogs! But when I was learning to care for another person, barely sleeping, breastfeeding nonstop, I found them to be two more warm bodies who just needed something from me when I just didn't have it to give. That was really a surprise to me, I was expecting this magical world of harmony and happiness. Their barking didn't wake the baby, thankfully, but it disrupted my peaceful moments, and I would find their hair stuck to my nipples when I was trying to get babe to latch. I was so frustrated by their presence, and I was not prepared for that. I felt immense guilt, and I felt like I didn't deserve to take care of other peoples' animals if I couldn't even stand to be around my own. The fog lifted, I became more confident in caring for my daughter, and I began to cherish their presence again. Of all of the things I felt prepared for, I wish I had known that this was ok, and normal, and, especially, temporary. My husband definitely fell into being the primary animal caretaker for the first year or so, and to a certain extend remains so. The best advice I have from my personal experience is to have a plan for who is going to take care of the pets' physical and emotional needs, because mama doesn't need that pressure.  Our big, happy family. I love that you are sharing these personal experiences, Rebecca, because so much of the postpartum experience is just that - deeply personal, unexpected, challenging, and beautiful. As far as planning to have help with the pets, your business Pals for Paws is an awesome resource for those who want to meet their animals physical and emotional needs while they rest, heal, and settle into life with a new baby. Can you share a bit about the services you offer and how they may be helpful to postpartum families?
We actually take care of peoples' animals even before the baby comes home! I think it's a great idea to establish a relationship with a pet sitter so you have a plan for your pets when you go into labor. Friends and family are often very helpful in this role, but we have on many occasions received the "we're heading to the hospital" text and got the dogs on our schedule until we heard they were ready to come home - it's one of those things that can give you peace of mind and allow dad and family to focus on being in the hospital and not worry about the dogs' schedule. I mentioned earlier adjusting the dogs' expectations in advance, and if you do so, you may not need any help with your dogs. However, if it's very important to your dog to get a walk each day (and for some dogs this makes all the difference in their behavior), you don't have to cut that out. We have dog walking clients who we have continued to service all that way through pregnancy, postpartum, and going back to work, without taking a break. For these families, it allowed them to keep that routine going for their dogs and get the dogs the exercise they need. If you've never used a dog walker before, you may consider it for the postpartum period to ease that pressure of "How am I going to take the dog out?" and "the dog is just so wound up!" Doggie daycare (which we don't offer, but there are many great facilities in the area) is another great option if you're feeling overwhelmed by the presence of your pets or guilty that they're bored. Your dog gets to go and spend all day playing with friends and comes home wiped out. That being said, once you are healed, walking your dog with your baby is a wonderful way to get exercise and fresh air. Just make sure to be safe - if you have a bigger dog whose pulling and strength you could handle pre-baby, it's a good idea to invest in a harness like an EasyWalk to give you a bit more control since you'll be managing a stroller simultaneously. You can babywear and walk dogs (I do!), but I do consider it a bit on the risky side if you have a large dog or a puller so use caution and your best judgement if you feel there's a possibility that you could be pulled forward. Thank you, Rebecca, for sharing all of this fantastic advice! I know I’ll be adding it to my Pinterest board to share with anyone who has questions about bringing home a new baby to meet their beloved animals. If you are looking for petsitting or dog walking care in Iowa City, North Liberty, Coralville, and Tiffin, you can reach Pals for Paws at (319) 535-0748 or [email protected]. Witching hour or as we call it in our house, “Unhappy Hour,” is that time when parental exhaustion meets baby’s desire to list all of the wrongs of the universe at the loudest possible volume. Baby standard time dictates when this will occur. With my oldest, her wind up began around 4:30 p.m. so that by the time my spouse returned from work, I was in desperate need of a hand off and hot shower. With my middle guy, 6:00 p.m. marked the beginning of unhappy hour, meaning bedtime for the oldest was often a juggling act of bouncing an unhappy baby and corralling a overtired toddler. Whether it occurs at 4 or 8 p.m., this tricky hour (or three) requires a basket of tricks and Nested Mama’s got a basket ready for you. In this three part series, I’ll share with you my favorite resources, tips, and sanity promoting approaches to surviving unhappy hour. Last week in Part 2, I shared with you some ideas about relaxation and affirmation to alter your experience of stressful moments. This week in Part 3, I’m sharing my witching hour playlist - those songs that always make me move and smile.  The witching hour - that time every day when baby is done and you are done. And everyone is exhausted.
Sometimes this time of day calls for a tight swaddle and white noise. Sometimes this time of day calls for a walk outside. And, sometimes, it calls for an epic dance party. That’s right - sometimes you just need to dance it out. I find this to be even more the case as we add more children to our family and the toddlers and preschoolers hit the tricky time of day right alongside the baby and the adults. Weary of being asked to play quietly lest they wake the baby, older children love the chance to jump and dance through this time day. Dig out a couple flashlights, pull the curtains, and you have your own light show, too. Here is my playlist for making it through the witching hour and then safely to dinner and (hopefully) an early bedtime.
These songs not your brand of happy tunes? No problem. Build yourself your own witching hour playlist so it is just a click or a swipe away. Whatever you do, don't forget to boogie. Witching hour or as we call it in our house, “Unhappy Hour,” is that time when parental exhaustion meets baby’s desire to list all of the wrongs of the universe at the loudest possible volume. Baby standard time dictates when this will occur. With my oldest, her wind up began around 4:30 p.m. so that by the time my spouse returned from work, I was in desperate need of a hand off and hot shower. With my middle guy, 6:00 p.m. marked the beginning of unhappy hour, meaning bedtime for the oldest was often a juggling act of bouncing an unhappy baby and corralling a overtired toddler. Whether it occurs at 4 or 8 p.m., this tricky hour (or three) requires a basket of tricks and Nested Mama’s got a basket ready for you. In this three part series, I’ll share with you my favorite resources, tips, and sanity promoting approaches to surviving unhappy hour. Last week in Part 1, I shared with you some tips and tricks for making your way through this wonky time of day. This week, I’m sharing some ideas about relaxation and affirmation that can potentially alter your experience of the witching hour.  RelaxationWhen you think about the experience of the witching hour with a tiny little one, relaxation is probably the last word that comes to mind. Maybe you are thinking, Johanna, you are absolutely nuts for even trying to put relaxation in the same sentence, even the same zip code, as this dreaded time of day. I hear you. I really do. And it makes good biological sense - we are programmed to hear our babies cry and have a corresponding response. Everything about their crying compels us to tend to them and meet their needs. If you are like me, often that tending comes with tense shoulders up to my ears, fast breathing, and a tightness in my chest when I’m in the thick of a late afternoon with a cranky baby. As you pace the floor, rock, nurse, and bounce, your way through this time of day, you can also take a moment and a breath. Right now, I want you to breathe with me. A nice big breath expanding your belly. Good. Now slowly let it out. That feels good, right? If you practice yoga, you know how important breath can be to find a sense of calm inside you. When in the thick of the witching hour, take that good deep breath. Now, let it out. Notice the tightness in your neck. Send you next exhale there. Note your shoulders. Help them drop down with your exhale. And so forth. It sounds so simple on paper, but it takes a combined focus of body and mind. And, it really does make a difference. Often when my babies were small and restless in my arms, I found that progressively relaxing my own body helped them, too. And, any space of calm and positivity you can carve for yourself into an otherwise less than wonderful time of day is a very good thing. AffirmationWhen tired at the end of a long day of parenting or facing what seems like a desert of time between wake up from nap and bedtime, my thoughts become filled with “shoulds” and with the shoulds come lots of frustration.
A good affirmation can stop those thoughts and change the direction of my mind. And, it can provide me a powerful touchstone when the day’s parenting has been more than a wee bit rough. Here are a few of my favorites -
Learning to practice relaxation and dig into some meaningful affirmations is well worth the effort. This is true for the witching hour, but it is also applicable to many moments beyond that time of day and phase of tiny baby life. Toddler throwing a tantrum with full on face-plant in the bank lobby? Breathe in and out. This is not an emergency. Trying to make dinner but life is one diaper explosion after epic nursing session after diaper explosion? Take a deep breath. This is tricky, not tragic. Feeling overwhelmed by parenting decisions x, y, and z? Breathe. I am enough. Kiddo losing it because he dropped the last jelly bean into the wasteland that is the back seat of your car? (And, if you are wondering, yes, this did just happen.) Breathe deep into your belly. I make space for my child’s feelings. Whatever parenting or other challenges life is throwing at you, breathe with me. You got this.  Witching hour or as we call it in our house, “Unhappy Hour,” is that time when parental exhaustion meets baby’s desire to list all of the wrongs of the universe at the loudest possible volume. Baby standard time dictates when this will occur.
With my oldest, her wind up began around 4:30 p.m. so that by the time my spouse returned from work, I was in desperate need of a hand off and hot shower. With my middle guy, 6:00 p.m. marked the beginning of unhappy hour, meaning bedtime for the oldest was often a juggling act of bouncing an unhappy baby and corralling a overtired toddler. Whether it occurs at 4 or 8 p.m., this tricky hour (or three) requires a basket of tricks and Nested Mama’s got a basket ready for you. In this three part series, I’ll share with you my favorite resources, tips, and sanity promoting approaches to surviving unhappy hour. Part I: 7 Tips & Tricks to Survive the Witching Hour
Got any witching hour tips? Share them in the comments below. Looking for postpartum support? Learn more about Nested Mama Prenatal & Postpartum Support.  Before the birth of my first child, I thought I read ALL the books. In hindsight, I did read an impressive stack of material. But, most of it focused on pregnancy and childbirth and not the blurry, hazy, beauty of the early postpartum days. I’m sure I at least whizzed by some statements about biologically normal newborn sleep, but in no way did those statements prepare me for the reality of nighttime parenting in the weeks and months that followed baby’s birth. While sniffing that wonderful scent of newborn baby and gazing in rapt attention at my child’s adorable features, I also found myself - like most new mothers - completely and utterly exhausted.
I’m not here to share with you a magical recipe that allows you to bypass normal newborn behavior. Nope - newborns need us, day and night, and that’s okay. Instead, I’ve got five tips - some you can even do before baby is born - to give yourself a soft, fluffy cushion of support, and yes, get more sleep in the newborn days. Here are five things that you can do to improve your quality of sleep with a newborn baby -
Want to get more Nested Mama tips and tricks for postpartum life? Connect with Nested Mama. Looking for a holistic, evidence-based approach to family sleep? Nested Mama offers Infant Sleep Education workshops and consultations. Find out more here. |
AuthorJohanna received a Ph.D. in English in 2014. Now a postpartum doula and educator of childbirth, breastfeeding, and infant sleep, she blogs about pregnancy, birth, postpartum, and parenting. 
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